*All these musings are rough drafts, written in an about hour and posted* 

The Love We Lost
Brier Island/Steveston 2017

Sometimes you think you know what love is meant to be.
You wonder through that jungle, swing from tree to tree.
Carefree and disregarding, you turn your trust away.
To the greatest love you have ever felt, you are left in agony.
Forgiveness, forgiveness, you burn the candle at both ends.
Till the light dies out, and leaves loves ashes, of what used to be.
But the ashes I hold in my hand, have been blown by the wind, out to sea where it all began.
The emptiness, the vacant heart, the loneliness that I feel will always be here, never gone. A mistake of loves collision, when all our love is gone.
They say that to lose true love, is kin to the death of a close friend.
If that’s the case, I’m the victim, of loves everlasting.
So turn away, and hide your heart in another perhaps more pleasing.
But you know you’ll never find true love like mine, the truth unveils the evening.
So life goes on, and each day passes, though that fire it still consumes.
The love we lost will never end, like the stars, the moon, the sun.
And when our days end and the light flickers unsure, I will be thinking of our together days. I will be thinking of you.

Dried Rose Petals
Brier Island, 2017

Dried rose petals, cover my table. They will never blow away.
Dried rose petals from not long ago. Like love, they know.
Dried rose petals. They have fallen from the bud. Left there to feed my memories, meandering above.
Dried rose petals. Hold their colour, of time gone past. Left their, amongst the clutter, of my every days past.
Dried rose petals. they sing a song with no chords. without their fragrance, though I remember their scent, and a hanging cross.
Dried rose petals. Scattered and pink. Never to be thrown out. They still make me think, of tears of forgiveness, lovers greatest loss.
Dried rose petals. Painting my seascape. Washed by waves, blown by the storms, they thunder by the shorelines, where we lovers once crossed.
Dried rose petals. They will always be there. Even when they turn to dust. And are left blown, as time is forgotten for another day.
Dried rose petals. That star will always shine. Turning and moving, as my earth grows older, their warmth will never challenge.
Dried rose petals. Will never leave my heart, as the rocks that line the beaches, they never will never leave my heart.
Dried rose petals. They colour my day. With painful sadness, even when I do pray. left alone with my thoughts, on every passing day.
Dried rose petals. Spread across my tables clutter. Are my remembrances of you. And my love that will last forever. Those petals are mirrors of you.
Dried rose Petals.

Show You The Way Home
RJG/November 2017/Steveston

When the sea lashes at your doorstep.
And the clouds dress the rising sun.
Night tucks behind the Dartmount Point, and I feel so alone.

The scent of salt and chilled breezes make the day begin, never does the day begin.
There is nothing like God’s medicine, avast, brings home those lost.
Don’t fear the deeps secrets, hold onto the cross.

And as the kindness of dawn, stretches your eyes wide open.
I will show you the way home.

When your skin feels like sparks and sea urchins, your heart as empty as big skies.
You know you’re not alone.
Not alone on tides high.

There is no fear but life itself.
When the dogs bark and bite at the clouds, to show you the way home.
Let love and thoughts unbelievable.
Though do not misjudge the real from reality.

Adrift on the foam, your not alone, as long as you are thinking of me.
And when the tides recede, then roll back again.
Between them you will find me.
To show you the way home.

The Hammer and the Nail
Beautiful Nightmare/The Cabin July 8, 2017

Last night I had a dream. You were the Hammer, I was the nail. And when I awoke, this house was built.
Last night I left this world, and went up there to a place, with love to spare. I dreamed I washed the world’s feet; and a calming, warm fog held me so close. There was no fear, there existed no here.
Last night I had a dream, where fish and shark lived in peace. Where hate and hell rang loves bell; that sounded eternal peace, and the Hammer hit home.
I have dreamt before, but always closed that door, then the Hammer hit the nail, and difference became one, and the clouds danced with the sun.
Last night I had a dream, where the blackness danced with the white, and death was alive. There was no fear when I finally opened my eyes. And the sea came falling from above, all around me, reiterated my love, for that losing cat-and-mouse-game. When then daylight came.
So how do I explain, this spiritual labyrinth. Where I would always win, even though I lived with sin. Reaching and searching for the meaning of all; waiting alone by myself.
Then the candle shone, and it burned me in the heart, where there was none. Then the Hammer hit the nail.
And the riddle was solved, though close I had come before. The Hammer caused no pain, rather, it balanced me bound by white oaken planks. Then the reason became clear. The reason I am here.
But it always was here, if only I had known, when before I dodged the Hammers blow. Now I cry out for more; and more and more.
Last night I had a dream. You were the Hammer, I was that nail. And the harder You hit, the brighter the light shone. And I washed the world’s feet. My war was over, and so rose the dawn. Hear Ye! Hear Ye!
Come Up – Gather Around
05/17/17 NDG

Hear Ye! Hear Ye!
Brier Island/2017
Here ye hear ye, come up, gather round. I have a message, for those looking to be found. These words of wisdom, from a man who didn’t know. That love is not real, it is something of a show.
I tried and tried but I just kept ending up in tears. There is no love when you are always on your knees.
Like those cartoons – we used to watch on Saturday TV. They made you smile in black and white as the world passed by your door. In your little room, you never really opened that door, to let the world in, never once opened the door.
There will be long long nights when your hearts been broken through. And you feel like death as her memory it haunts you. Don’t ask for help, your always on your own. Staying up late at night just waiting for that phone – call.
Ha ha, I fooled you. I really didn’t mean what I said. I wasn’t in love with you, I was just messing with your head.
So if your as lonely, as lonely as this guy. Don’t be surprised, if you can never see the sky. It’s the finish line that always seemed so long, but man it hurts so bad, to find out that you just dragged me along.
Heavens heavens, you were in the starry skies above. But now I’m blinded. It’s was hard to figure out what you call love. You wanted a gold band, but man, what could I do. You ran out of loves time, as I waited here for you.
This leaking ship must head on back to port. It’s done its last voyage, lets cut it up for scrap. This is the last final voyage that will carry me away, but the ships still in port, if you have anything else to say.
So hear ye hear ye, come up, gather round. Watch this clown dance, celebrate the loneliness he has found. But don’t feel sorry, his life has always been this way. Uncertainty walks alongside, what was a man till yesterday.
My my my, if you find that love that you never ever thought you would. I will be happy for you, as happy as I could. But deep inside your heart, wherever that may be found, dressing up for the party, now your passing our love around.
Well; it’s back to my ship, this ship of Broken Hearts. It has been patched, taped and glued, ready for a new start. But there’s no real life on board, but the ghost of your lost dude. You can see him walk the plank, even give him a push. Oh my, I wish you would.
So hear ye hear ye, come up, gather round. I have given up, trying to be found. But if you can’t see that, then it must be salt in your eyes. So think of me dear when you look up at that empty sky.
Hear ye hear ye…………………………….!

The Colours of Spring

05/15/17 NDG

Springtime is beaconing, following winters requiem. Darkness has left away, warmth rules the day.
Bluebirds and robins, sing out their sweet songs. Thunder storms fill the sky, bringing life’s rain.
The earth is believing, there’s no rhyme or reason, to the magnificence of a spring day, washed by the rain.
Where do you explain, where this magic is born of. How can you say that life is, not born out of pain.
Part of this cycle, earths constant recycle, of life that has died off, replaced by new hope.
Waves of warm raindrops, run across my eyes, down from the heavens of where all life it comes. Bathed in such beauty, Kaleidoscope unruly, awash in natures colours, painting the world.
Lilacs and daffodils, colours my eyes fill, makes me think how so, did this all appear.
Bubble-bees and butterflies, ye who made this is so wise, how did it all happen, how could you know.
Man and a woman, earth and a starry sky, darkness and daylight, love in their eyes. Together forever, converging on holiness. Let us not leave unguarded, loves closing doors.
Is there anything more beautiful, than love and its warm fog, which wraps around your heart, dressed up and yearning, for the colours of spring.

The Storm Before the Calm

05/15/17 NDG

How can you teach me, that your God is better than mine? How can you kill your brothers and sisters, saying your God is better than mine?
Can’t we just all take a step back and look at our souls, to court all the gods to help the healing begin. Or are we just fighting that primeval battle again, the storm before the calm.
Are we any less human, the infidels some will say, if we don’t believe what they chant, if we don’t bend when we pray. Religion can be so fearful, if we chose the wrong path, led astray by zealots, harbouring no dignity, no path.
Buddhism, Sikhism, Hinduism, Judaism or Atheist, what does it matter when your laid to rest. Diasporic, indigenous or Agnostic, God is who you believe He is, the winder of the big clock.
Islam, Christianity, or Bahia if you please. Does it really matter, if you fall down to your knees. Who is to say that it is one god who makes life’s rules, and all the others were conceived as ignorant, malleable tools.
There is one god however, who toils for our souls, that being the god of love, it is everything to us all. Without this love, we would resemble beasts in ancient caves, where religion began and was seeded, love was what He gave, love is what we needed.
I am sure to say that wherever we live, whatever tongue we speak at home, no matter our religious beliefs, love will always endure. As for choice of religion, I’ll leave that up to you, but please remember, it’s just the storm before the calm.
It is not my place to speak displeasure, or in hast the words of love, that is in all hearts, and holds us up, as we sail on earth’s great ark. Love can make us joyful, or it can kill giants who showed no fear, love is the pathway, it is the most direct, so clear.
Please do not take my words as gold, written above. It is just that for me, I try my best, to make my religion – love. And when the tides open, and the skies turn an azure blue, and your boat comes to port, then starboard once more. You will be in God’s loving hands my brothers and sisters, in the storm before the calm.

The Crab and the Shooter
05/03/17 Lake Champlain

I drove down to the ocean, trying to touch the sea. I was told it would help me, help my eyes to see.
But when I got there a storm was a brewin. I got caught up in the gale. By the time I got off the beach, it had claimed another male.
And the winds they blew, and the sky fell down. I got back up my feet for a final look around.
I asked a local fisherman, how you save yourself from the sea. He winked, then said; “its our destiny.”
Then I took back to the road, trying to avoid more gales. But was caught up in a squal and thrown ashore again, on a beach where everyone fails.
So I talked to a crab I met, as it preened the meat from my bones. “Are you part of this existence? Or am I all alone?” The crab took me by the hand and said; “Come see for yourself.”
Open yur eyes flatlander, life is not all about wealth. It is about family, love and your failing health. Me; I’m just a crustacean. You; well I’m not quite sure. But that is for you to find out, before you close that final door.
So I pondered and I pondered. How can this crab talk to me? Then I woke up from that nightmare, and breathed reality.
Standing there, on that ocean of desire; me, the crab, the ocean. They lit this heart on fire, with their magical love potion.
I turned back as the crab played a fiddle, I told him it’s my desire to find where the tides end and where they begin, can you please explain to me this timeless riddle?
The sachem of all crustaceans told me, your on the edge of beginning. But tighten up your deepest thoughts, don’t hate or want, otherwise, you’ll be sinning.
Like babes in the woods, we stood there, his claw clenched in my hand. We embraced and gazed out there dreaming, onto his watery land. Then we danced and danced, even kicking up the sand so fair. And I cried as he gorged himself on my flesh, but I was never eally there.
And so I end this lonely saga; one man verses the sea. If it wasn’t for my crab friend, I would have been lost – a drifting victim, at the whims of destiny.

Drifting Apart

Drifting apart, as the tides of love collide.
Drifting apart, no longer by my side.
Why do these seas churn the brine into black, while I cast loves nets, trying to land you back.
Drifting apart, as the space between us grows more distant.
Drifting apart, fighting the tides of loves resistance.
There are no answers to the secrets of the sea, love was the reason, the swells first brought you to me.
Brought you to me, then those tides pulled me under. Washed up on the beachfront, to the echo of its thunder.
Drifting apart, once my mate, my ship, my crew.
Drifting apart, further and further away from you.
The ocean is a mirror, that reflects my spirit back at you. Look again, before the winds turn, I’m looking back at you.
And if you ever come again someday, to this lonely, lonely sea, cast your eyes out seawards, and you’ll be staring right at me.
Drifting apart, where does this ocean end.
Drifting apart and always and forever, you will be my very best friend. (For NS).

The Brier Island Rap-Jig. How Hardened Men Find Fun

Montreal, 04/23/17

Listen up! Wellllllllll; It all started last summer with a trip out on the Fundy.
Trying to find myself, is it a Friday or a Monday?
The good Lord told me, “Get out there and fish. Lobsters are the quarry, from the Fundy to the dish.
So I talked with Captain Swift who told me no lies. “It can break your back and has for many guys, who appear at the dock with the ocean in their eyes.”
I said ok, and he said great! I told i’m ready for war, he said well hold on, just wait.
You gotta stay alive and using your head, or end up in Davy Jones Locker, where you are always dead.
The Bay Challengers’ in ship shape, and were looking for some guys. Then he said you’ll be a bander and looked right into my eyes.
“We don’t want no cream puffs, are you ready to fish?
I told him ‘yes I am and waiting,’ with a bit of a lisp. Captain Swift said greenhorn listen, but are you ready for me? Then my mind flashed back to that white whale, Ahab and the cruel sea.
But this skip is a pussy cat, a good soul and a gentleman at that. I said I like your boat, he said I like your hat.
After that, he took me on board cause he said I needed a drink, but a salt water bath, who woulda think? The peace the sea has brought to me, was a gift from that fisherman friend, who never spoke a bad word while fishing close to death.
Wellllllllll, we fished and set the trawls and then fished some more. Until those January storms closed all the trap doors.
So I went down to the pound, after a month at sea, and asked that fella Ross,’ yu got any work for me?’
As the seas raged and crashed, the pigeons all came home, up to my neck in lobster crates, I had found a new home.
This Brier Island Jig, I write for Jamie and you, is for all who fish those critters in the deep, cold blue.
Through storms and high tides, we had scoured St Mary’s Bay, then it was out onto the Fundy, where the real men come to play.
To play, to fish, to try to make a living, in that watery vastness, the place where I almost touched heaven. And it draws me back, like that salmon to the stream. I now know my place in life, like that volcano, I’ve done my day heaving. But it was all paid back in triple, now I’m back to believing.
Now I have been to wars and I’ve seen peace, but I’ve never felt more alive, more spiritual as when I feeshed. My puck crossed the crease, but I haven’t quite yet won, though my life is changing and I’ve put away my gun.
And I haven’t never been so young and oh so free, as when I stepped on the Challenger, captained by Jamieeee.
So learn from my lesson, learn from the sea. You’d better reach your goals, ‘look – it worked for meeEee.’
Then get your slickers on, your noreaster and your boots, and get out on a boat, it’s something so damned good. The fine fishermen of Digby Neck will open their hearts to you. If you work hard, be a team player on that salty ocean brew. And when you give up your bad habits, like too much toking and too much brew, the depths of the Fundy will spill lifes’ secrets, and it will overwhelm you.
So it’s Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum, you folks on ‘The Neck,’ saved me from flying into the sun. Thanks, God Bless, but for now I gots to run. To catch up on those lessons, of how hardened men find fun.

Dear Father – Where Are You?

Lake Champlain

Dear Father, please where are you? It’s been such a long time, since your blessings were with me, I feel lost by design.
Dear Father, I listened, but you led me astray, to a place of bitter darkness, where the Dark Prince stole my soul away.
Dear Father, I have tried to, bring you into my heart, so why have you left me, fallen completely apart?
I never did mean, in my life to cause anyone pain. But I forgot myself, then fell down, followed by that dark rain. It poured, and it poured, washing away my confidence. Now here I sit, between good and bad, on a spiritual fence.
Dear Father, I am so sorry, but I’m only flesh and blood, and I’ve stopped all that praying, since I lost your love.
Dear Father can you hear me, or am I still alone, though I have tried to find a back road to your holy domaine.
Dear Father, your disciple, she tried and she tried, to bring me back on board, to be by your side. But I lost her, I lost all, but this poor heart it still beats, but it needs, to be overhauled, and put back again.
I never did mean, in my life to cause anyone pain. But I forgot myself, then fell down, followed by that dark rain. It poured, and it poured, washing away my confidence. Now here I sit, between good and bad, on a spiritual fence.
Dear Father, do you know, that I write from the core of my heart. And each day, that passes, finds us further apart.
Dear Father, are you out there, or am adrift on this sea, of indecision, and doubt, that is what’s become of me.
Dear Father, I promise, to try once again. To reach through those rain clouds, to breath without pain. But I fear, you’re not there, and never really were, so I’ll just keep on going, on going, through heaven or hell.
I never did mean, in my life to cause anyone pain. But I forgot myself, then fell down, followed by that dark rain. It poured, and it poured, washing away my confidence. Now here I sit, between good and bad, on a spiritual fence.

Shadows of Loves Loss

4/19/17 NDG

Watch out for broken glass; but don’t stop walking. The ghosts of dusk appear, you can hear their whispered talking. It’s only the shadows of loves loss, living here amongst you. Shadows of loves loss, hidden glimpses so haunt you.
Don’t panic, don’t threat, it will go away in the morning; if you survive the nights haunting. It’s only the shadows of loves loss.
Shadows of loves loss, you’ve been my friend for so long. Shadows of loves loss, can I take back all my wrongs.
So don’t turn your back, unless you know the coast is clear. Shadows of loves loss, can’t you please disappear. Shadows of lost hearts, you’ve turned my world upside down. Left my soul broke and empty, in a million-dollar home.
You can’t shake it off, so take a number, join the line. Then finish off that quart, and the pain turns benign. But there’s never enough Bourbon, when those shadows paint your town. No place to escape, when loves loss comes to town.
I can see you sitting there, so beautiful, so fair. And as I close my eyes and I lose my mind gently, my whispers fill your hair. Shadows of loves loss, please don’t keep me awake. Leave me at rest, trying to heal this heartache.
Shadows of loves loss, you turned my world upside down. Left my soul broke and empty, in a million-dollar home. Shadow of loves of loves loss, why are you doing this to me. Shadows I fear, please let this heart go free.
(For NS)